Ass Murdering Hot Sauce by Bisummo
I remembered reading another review of this hot sauce online a couple of months ago and wished that I had had some of my own to try and then…WHAMMO! Todd Ross of Bisummo sends us a request to taste their hot sauce for ourselves. It was as though he was reading our minds. Thanks for using your Jedi mind powers for the forces of good, Todd. Soon thereafter, a couple of bottles of their Ass Murdering Hot Sauce showed up on our doorstep and I wasted very little time in cracking open the bottle and pouring over and in just about everything except breakfast cereal.
There’s a lot of “ass” hot sauces out there these days. You’ve probably seen them. Ass in the Tub. Baboon Ass. Neal’s Hairy Ass. Ass Kickin. Big Daddy’s Ass Burn. Ass Blaster. Flaming Coon Ass. Ass Reaper. Smack My Ass and Call Me Sally. The list goes on and on.
Face it, folks…that’s a lot of ass. Despite the fact that this sauce also highlights the “ass” (it’s a donkey…get it?), this sauce is one of a kind. I am also glad to I can say that that is a good thing. This sauce doesn’t reinvent the wheel with its ingredients, but it has an impressive list of good stuff.
Ingredients: lime juice (lime juice from concentrate, sodium benzoate, lime oil, sodium metabisulfite), jalapeno peppers, serrano peppers, dijon mustard (water, vinegar, mustard seed, salt, white wine, fruit pectin, citric acid, tartaric acid, sugar, spice), garlic, habanero peppers, vinegar, molasses, olive oil, turmeric
Nearly flawless in regards to being all-natural. I love sauces that have a mustard base, so this sauce had that going for it before I ever opened the bottle. Habaneros, serranos, and jalapenos are a great mix of peppers to use in a sauce. Thumbs up!
The Dijon Mustard base of this sauce evokes a unique and extremely delicious experience for the brave individuals that dare to venture past the slow, gradually intensifying burn of the Habanero, Serrano and Jalapeno Peppers.
First impression: Great label graphics on a flask-shaped bottle. Sometimes, sauce makers will use fancy labels to disguise a sub-standard sauce…but the sauce (at least by aroma) seems to be top-notch. I can say that the color and appearance lack a certain aesthetic appeal, but the Dijon mustard aroma and nice thick consistency makes up for that to me. This sauce is fairly thick, and took a few good shakes to dislodge some tasty globs of sauce from within.

Taste: This sauce is a little gritty in a way, perhaps a little chunky with pepper seeds. My first thought in tasting out of the jar was the lime and garlic overtones were pretty strong, and the initial pepper taste seems very jalapeno-ish to me. The taste is a delightfully evolving experience, both from the perspective of heat and taste. This sauce tasted a little different to me each time I tried it, but I really dug the melange of peppers in this sauce. Jalapeno-bold, serrano-touched, and habanero-heat really is an apt summation of the pepper taste. The heat, though, is something else. After a few bites of this, I was thinking this sauce wasn’t all that hot. Perhaps not ass murdering…perhaps ass maiming was more like it.
Then my palate reached critical mass.
Given enough of this hot sauce, the heat will (and does) catch up with you. At more than one meal, I found myself sucking a little wind in between bites. The initial heat I would call modest, perhaps 6/10 or so. However, it takes relatively little extra consumption to really torque that heat up on your taste buds. I thought the heat reached a good, solid 8.5/10 or so with my meals, and I tried this on a lot of foods. This sauce performed admirably either poured over food, like a marinade or condiment, or mixed into foods like with soups/stews. You wouldn’t think a mustard-based sauce would be good in chili, but this one sure is. I particularly liked this sauce with chicken, and used it smeared thickly over broiled chicken that was baked into the meat. Delectable.
Overall recommendation: I seldom froth compliments over sauces like I am for this sauce, but this sauce has quickly reached the level of a new fave for me. I think the sauce could have used a little less turmeric in it, since the yellow-ness of the sauce clung to my fingers more than expected, but that’s the extent of the constructive criticism I could offer. If you like mustard-based hot sauces, you will adore this sauce. Thick, tasty, and pretty darn hot, it has enough utility to go with a variety of foods. Quite simply, I would buy this sauce if I ever saw it sold locally. Give it a try and see for yourself. Enjoy!




















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Commented at April 24, 2008- 9:29 am
Another raving review! Dang Turk, you trying to take over the hot sauce universe?
Joe, great review and summation of this sauce. I also did a review over on Taste The Fear of this sauce. I ageee with you statements, this is much more than a mustard. It’s mustard based yes, but the peppers really make this sauce. Try it basted on when grilling. I used Spare ribs, but chicken should work well too. I had it mixed in with my brats & kraut last night for dinner. This IS a top notch hot sauce.
Commented at April 24, 2008- 7:15 pm
Joe & Linda – thanks so much for your great review. It’s always nice to meet some more incredibly awesome people in the Fiery Foods industry. We are planning on going to Jungle Jim’s Weekend of Fire in August so stop by and say hello if you’re free that weekend. You won’t be able to miss us; we’ll be the manufacturer that has that clueless deer caught in the head lights look. Love the references to Stars Wars in the review…really brings back memories. The whole thing was really well written and interesting so if that whole Doctor thing doesn’t work out for ya then you certainly could become an writer. I discovered how good our sauce taste with chili while noshing on a chili cheese dog but thought I would keep that lil jewel to myself until we could win some Chili cook-offs with our secret weapon…oh well, cat’s outta the bag. F.Y.I. – I don’t know how far Jungle Jim’s is away from Columbus but they recently started carrying AMHS.
DK – The hot sauce industry only has a universe? We were hoping to take over the Galaxy but universe will do for now. Insert evil laugh here.
Commented at April 24, 2008- 8:05 pm
I thought galaxies resided within the universe? Guess I was thinking too big for ya! You’ve been out on that peninsula for a while now havn’t you? LOL!!
See you in August!
Commented at April 24, 2008- 8:26 pm
You’re right DK….you showed me up in astrology class. Boy, I thought Buddha was every where on this webernet thing but you’re a pretty ubiquitous presence yourself.
Commented at April 24, 2008- 9:05 pm
“ubiquitous presence” ? Is that kinda like Christmas presents?
Commented at April 24, 2008- 9:06 pm
I smell bacon, BRB.
Commented at April 24, 2008- 11:41 pm
I am everywhere, yet nowhere at the same time. Nice review Joe. Ass mustard is taking a foothold in the hot sauce world. Scary thought on one of the ugliest sauces going, but Ass mustard is good stuff.
Commented at April 25, 2008- 7:03 am
DK – “ubiquitous presence” Okay, you busted me…I got ran out and bought a word of the day calendar to try and redeem myself after my goofy mix up I made with galaxies and universe. You would think a Star Wars fan would know these things. To top it off, I then mistake astrology for astronomy…it’s probably safer if I don’t talk at all but where’s the fun in that?
Buddha – You are every where but I think you young Padawan DK has been trained well and soon, the student will become the Master.
I’m a Star Wars dork…what can I say?
Commented at April 25, 2008- 7:25 am
After reading the review elsewhere I picked up a bottle AMHS at Jungle Jim’s last weekend. I opened it up and like you said I had to force some out of the bottle. when it come out onto my brat I looked at it and thought, oooh, I hope it tastes better than it looks. Boy I was pleased with the taste of it. I’ll reach for it now instead of my Boarshead deli style mustard I’ve been using the past couple years. Going to grab a few Arby roast beefs this weekend and load em down. Should be a tatse treat. Nice review Joe and I’ll see you next Saturday at North Market.
Commented at April 25, 2008- 4:11 pm
This sauce also goes great on and in burgers, we also have a mustard vinagrette recipe featuring it. Very good stuff!
Commented at April 30, 2008- 10:57 am
I just eat it strait out of the bottle.
Yum…..I’m having Brauts tonight with AMHS